Types of Marketing

You see a gorgeous girl at a party.
You go up to her and say, "I am very rich. Marry me!"
That's Direct Marketing.


You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl.
One of your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says, "He's very rich. Marry him."
That's Advertising.


You see a gorgeous girl at a party.
You go up to her and get her telephone number.
The next day you call and say, "Hi, I'm very rich. Marry me."
That's Telemarketing.

You're at a party and see a gorgeous girl.
You get up and straighten your tie, you walk up to her and pour her a drink.
You open the door for her, pick up her bag after she drops it,and offer her A ride, and then say, "By the way, I'm very rich. Will you marry me?"
That's Public Relations.


You're at a party and see a gorgeous girl.
She walks up to you and says, "You are very rich. I want to marry you"
That's Brand Recognition.


You see a gorgeous girl at a party.
You go up to her and say, "I'm rich. Marry me"
She gives you a nice hard slap on your face.
That's Customer Feedback.

Thanks to Amit Goyal who shared this.

To enter into the heart

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One way to enter into Man's heart

Only way to enter into Woman's heart

Before & After Marriage

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Before the marriage:


He: Yes. At last. It was so hard to wait.

She: Do you want me to leave?

He: NO! Don't even think about it.

She: Do you love me?

He: Of course!

She: Have you ever cheated on me?

He: NO! Why you even asking?

She: Will you kiss me?

He: Yes!

She: Will you hit me?

He: No way! I'm not such kind of person!

She: Can I trust you?



After the marriage:


you can read it from bottom to the top




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Thanks to "Shaual Hamid Maideen P" for his email

Romantic 1st lines...and deadly 2nd ones

A local newspaper ran a competition asking for a rhyme with the most romantic first line... but the least romantic second line.

Here are some of the entries they received.

I thought that I could love no other
Until, that is, I met your brother.

Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.
But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl’s empty and so is your head.

Oh loving beauty you float with grace
If only you could hide your face

Kind, intelligent, loving and hot;
This describes everything you are not

I want to feel your sweet embrace
But don’t take that paper bag off of your face

I love your smile, your face, and your eyes -
Damn, I’m good at telling lies!

My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife:
Marrying you screwed up my life

I see your face when I am dreaming.
That’s why I always wake up screaming

My love, you take my breath away.
What have you stepped in to smell this way

My feelings for you no words can tell,
Except for maybe “go to hell”

What inspired this amorous rhyme?
Two parts vodka, one part lime

Men & Women

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A woman was out golfing one day when she hit the ball into the woods. She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap.

The frog told her, "If you release me from this trap, I will grant you three wishes. "The woman freed the frog, and the frog said, "Thank you, but I failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes. Whatever you wish for, your husband will get it ten times!" The woman said, "That's okay."

For her first wish, she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in theworld. The frog warned her, "You do realize that this wish will also make yourhusband the most handsome man in the world, an Adonis whom women will flock to".

The woman replied, "That's okay, because I will be the most beautifulwoman and he will have eyes only for me."

So, KAZAM-she's the most beautiful Woman in the world!



For her second wish, she wanted to be the richest woman in the world. Thefrog said, "That will make your husband the richest man in the world. And he will be ten times richer than you. "

The woman said, "That's okay, because what'smine is his and what's his is mine."

So, KAZAM-she's the richest woman in the world!



The frog then inquired about her third wish, and she answered, "I'd like amild heart attack!"


Moral of the story: Women are clever. Don't mess with them!


Attention female readers: This is the end of the joke for you. Stop here and continue feeling good!



Male readers: Please scroll down.





The man had a heart attack ten times milder than his wife!!!

Moral of the story: Women are really dumb but think they're really smart! Let them continue to think that way and just enjoy the show!


PS: If you are a woman and are still reading this; it only goes to show that women never listen!!!



Thanks to "Siva" who share the above..